Vegetarianism

A Day in the Life of a Vegetarian

Scene: I’m in the kitchen at work heating up some leftover lo me with ginger sauce. A female coworker enters the room and strikes up a conversation about vegetarianism.

Coworker: “Do you eat tuna?”
Me: “No, I don’t eat meat.”
Coworker: “Oh, tuna is meat?”
Me: “Yup, anything that is an animal is meat”
Coworker: “Oh, I didn’t know that tuna were animals. What about fish?”
Me: [Blank stare.] “Um … tuna are fish.”
Coworker: “Really? I didn’t know what it was.”
Me: “Just because it says ‘Chicken of the Sea’ on the can doesn’t mean it’s chicken.”

Various ramblings about the tastiness of burgers and how I manage to avoid the “temptation” (cough) of meat.

Coworker: “I don’t really like bacon, though. Do you eat bacon?”
Me: [Blink. Blink.]
Coworker: “No?”
Me: “Um, no. Bacon is meat.”
Coworker: “Really?”
Me: “Yeah. It comes from a pig. What did you think it was?”
Coworker: “I don’t know. Food?”
Me: “Uh, yeah. It’s meat. It’s from a pig. Pigs are animals.”
Coworker: “Oh, yeah, I know that.”
Me: “Um, ok … well, pigs are animals. Any part of the animal is meat: pigs feet, bacon, ham, whatever.”
Coworker: “Oh. So you don’t eat animals?”
Me: [Blank stare.]

...I'll leave that one up to my viewing public to decipher. I hope I didnt take away brain cells/IQ points by sharing this with you