A lesson in word vomit

i've learned that no matter what your personal demons may be, there are some things other people should just never know. Sometimes it's just better for the greater good to handle them on your own.

"Necole: I mean because everyone was rooting for the two of you. You were like the cutest couple ever

Chilli: Well you know what’s funny. I will say this and I know it’s gonna be everywhere. Lord, Tameka gonna be trying to fight people. But honestly I will say, although Marlon (Wayans) is the one that got away, Usher is the one that I truly did love. Like that was truly my first adult love. I love him very much and I will always love him. I don’t know how you love someone that deeply and just stop loving them. I’m not in love with him anymore but I can’t say that I don’t love him anymore. And of course I do want him to be happy and all but me and him had what I never had in any of my other relationships, and that was chemistry. Even in that picture that you have up. Any picture that you see with the two of us, you see it. It’s just there! I could be standing next to him til this day and people will be like “Wow”. It’s not that you are wondering if we are back together again, it’s just that we look like we just go together"

Source: That Grape Juice

What will summer bring

R&B newcomer Noel Gourdin has great momentum going into his debut CD, 'After My Time.'

Led by the first single, 'The River,' the song was the number two most-added tune in the country upon being serviced to radio.

'The River' was also featured in the film 'Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins,' which starred Martin Lawrence, Mo'Nique and Cedric The Entertainer.

Syndicated radio personality Steve Harvey has become a huge champion of Gourdin's single and his encouraging listeners to buy the record has caused it to reach #11 on Google Trends and made digital single sales increase more than 108%. 'After My Time' is set to hit stores in August.

taken from BV.com
Click for the Official

..personally, i thoroughly enjoy what he brings to the table.


As everyone knows, i'm a beyond big fan of football. My dad is as well. And because satellite TV is such a marvelous invention, he stumbled upon something (in my opinion) very cool. There's a women's football association. They even tackle. It's not a fake imitation....they made it just like the men's. Fabulous. You can read up more here. The abundance of teams are here..

I've never been more excited to uncover something thats been existence for so long =0)



Because of all the shenanigan-fuckery that people have been tossing in my direction in recent months, I have had to readjust my set up for the end of the year. Instead of the car that I was planning to get for my birthday, I pitched the idea of a new laptop to my parents. I dont think I can afford to pay for the repair of the school laptop and then buy a brand new one. At the same time, that beloved camera that I had hoped to acquire for my upcoming summer adventures will alas, be shoved back to December 25th. Le sigh. In the in-between, i'm looking into investing in an external hard drive, so that I dont muddle up my mom's computer with my crap. There's no reason to spread the technological suffering. After all, despite the absence of favor requiring (if anyone can think of the right way to word this please feel free to share. it eludes me) ,never ending kindness of friends, I dont wanna keep utilizing them to fix PCs everytime they crash. They hold more weight than that. =0)

The HD

My Secret Love...


Problems Resolved

So after a lot of begging and pleading and all kinds of bargaining, my mother and I were able to rise up off our knees (god just imagine) and walk away from the school paying $250 for the laptop that was maimed. For those of you that think thats outrageous (even though it is), the original bill was $1400. Thats right. I'd say I made off like a bandit. So i'm basically gonna use my next check to get the school off my back forever, and put that whole sordid business behind me.

And now, I am off to celebrate a big-headed boy's birthday with some Texas-sized drinks. Oh yes. It has been a fabulous Saturday. ^_^


even my mother gave me permission to, upon getting my first check, do some shopping. For the record, I did pay off my phone and credit card, while putting half on another. I'm focused man

new bags

first ever suit, complete w/pants and skirt (pinstriped of course)

new work shirts

and new shoes to get me through the rest of the year!

...I also bought my mother her first Carol's Daughter product. She informed me this morning that she's found love with it.


17 months to the day

this will be the longest entry I have, where I personally said absolutely nothing...

April 25th,
7:57 am
The difference between police officers and the rest of us is that police officers always have guns and can always kill us. Therefore, they need to pause before they act. Now, clearly in pausing, they may be killed. But given the statistics, they are still less likely to be killed by one of us then we are to be killed by one of them. Oh, and if we happen to be black or hispanic or male or in poor neighborhood, we are even more likely to be killed by them then they are to be killed by us. Now, this is not to fault all police officers. Being a police officer is an incredibly difficult job where a person’s life is always on the line. But when you hold the power of life and death, you have an ethical responsibility to wield it carefully and with clearly defined limits. Is that not the basis of our democracy? To check unlimited power?
Clearly, the judge needs to punish every officer that fired his gun that night. To kill an innocent, unarmed man is criminal.
— Posted by Liz

April 25th,
8:53 am
Time after time again, young black men are killed with impunity by members of the police force. Years ago, a young immigrant named Amadou Diallo was shot and killed under a barrage of bullets because he reached for his wallet. Now, a young man is killed on the morning of his
wedding. There are many,many, other examples also. All the vitims were unarmed. The poilice were, on every single occasion, found not guilty. Whether one accepts this or not, the common thread is the victims’ skin color. That-and that alone- made them easy targets. Racism is alive and well and prospering in America and, frankly speaking, it’s the five hundred pound gorilla in the room that all pretend to ignore. We’ve come a long way? Hardly.
— Posted by anastasios sarikas

April 25th,
9:26 am
bill: What does sean’s pre-marital or for that matter, marital behavior have anything to do with this case?The question has to be only whether the police acted not according to their standards but to the standards acceptabale to society as a whole. It is the these police people who are essentially on trial and not Sean Bell. In actuality, it is our society which is on trial and which has to set standards of operation for our para-military police forces and decide just where that line between liberty and protection lies. We have a tendency of reacting emotionally in times of stress and are willing to give up a massive amount of our freedoms at that moment and when we begin to realize that we have allowed the use of police powers,
para or military or even presidential to impinge upon our very freedom of life, it is too late for it becomes almost impossible to reghain that balance without massing the forces to do such. Beware just how much liberty you give up for what you think is your protection because as we have seen since the beginnming of time, once you allow that line to be crossed all you have left is destruction.
— Posted by Howard

April 25th,
9:27 am
I think it is appalling that this case was tried without a jury, and that the verdict was not guilty on all counts. This is justice? What about justice for the victim, his fiancee, and their families? Also, what does this say to the larger community (especially to those in the police force)–that excessive force and violence, and murder of innocent people will be tolerated without consequences. This is the mark of an injust judicial system, a passive society and prejudiced people, and manipulated court system. Shame, shame, shame on this judge, and
even greater shame on the trigger-happy cops.
— Posted by sophelet

April 25th,
9:29 am
If you want mob rule go to Russia..if you can find a better system then I suggest you pack up and move…let’s move on…
— Posted by Bill

April 25th,
9:29 am
Thank God. Justice was done. A sad incident for all, but when you drive a car at a police officer after they’ve told you to stop, only bad things can happen.
— Posted by Dan Gutin

April 25th,
9:30 am
By all accounts, Mr. Bell got what he asked for. Had he kept his mouth shut and not threatened the officers, he would be alive today.
— Posted by william

April 25th,
9:31 am
A simple observation from Australia is that this is a gross obscenity and a travesty of justice if justice still exists in America. When Australian police kill people it generally takes one or two shots. 50 shots appears to be a tad excessive if responsible use of force is still considered necessary or desirable. Perhaps NYPD could send their cops to our training colleges so that they can learn to kill with one shot.
— Posted by Greg Angelo

April 25th,
9:34 am
I wasnt there but 50 shots seems excessive. Having said that, as an Obama supporter I BEG the African-American community not to act out of anger because the world is watching. Any violence will hurt our chances to take the White House and begin changing this nation. — a white man.
— Posted by nathan

April 25th,
9:35 am
I think the Judge in the case ruled the right way. On paper it looks like a cut and dried case that the cops acted recklessly, umpteen bullets fired, etc. But in court the testimony wasn’t so clear, a lot of those testifying for the prosecution changed stories between grand jury and the trial, and there were absolute facts like the fact that Sean Bell drove that car at the cops (whether because he thought they were cops or not is irrelevent). I sympathize with the family of the victim, and I think there are questions to be answered from this case, but from a legal standpoint the burden of proof is on the prosecution to prove that the cops acted with reckless indifference, not the defense to prove the cops were acting properly. To show reckless indifference they would need to show that there was absolutely no justification for firing, that the cops had no basis for thinking they were in danger. The fact that someone with Bell claimed to have a gun before the shooting, and then the fact that Bell drove the car towards the cops makes for a background where the cops had reason to believe their lives were threatened. It is easy looking back to say why, and given the number of young blacks and hispanics shot by cops it is not surprising people are upset. But quite frankly, look at
the scene of what happened here. It is early in the morning, it is outside a place known to have problems, you have alchohol involved (Sean Bell was drunk, which means his judgement was probably not the best, he could freak out easily) and so forth. The evidence as to whether the cops identified themselves or not was not that clear, and the judge has to weight that against the burden of proof rule. And may I remind you that in other cases this judge has handled, he has ruled against cops, so you cannot argue that it is because he is biased for cops or against black or hispanic victims, that he was working on the law. And does it dawn on you why cops are armed in the city? People make it sound like the cops are armed and few other people are, and while that may be true with law abiding citizens, it isn’t true among a lot of people on the shady side in this city, and cops face real uncertainty,
especially in areas of the city that are high crime areas. That said, in this case I think there will be civil action. Even if not criminally negligent (and people, criminal weight of evidence is quite different then civil burdens) there are serious questions here about supervision and training, it sounds like this operation was allowed to get out of control, and there should be penalties for that and the cops themselves should be looked at quite closely to see if they are fit for duty, and that would be legitimate.
— Posted by wdef

So an unarmed man is killed in a hail of gunfire and no one is to blame. But another man is convicted of 3 first time tax misdemeanours and goes to jail for 3 years. So out of balance, isn’t it?
— Posted by Meesy

April 25th,
12:45 pm
“Keystone cops confronting an innocent man is what fueled this

No, what fueled this incident was a drunken sense of bravado. Bell was no “innocent” having been arrested on drug dealing and illegal gun possession charges multiple times. “This seems like such a common sense solution to these cases of mistaken identity, which can so easily spiral out of control, and end as this one did.” It’s not mistaken identity that causes these situation to “spiral”. It’s drunken criminals with a contempt for law enforcement and society and believe that they are above the law that causes scenes like this to “spiral out of control.” Had Bell done the correct thing and not tried to run over a person wearing a badge and
who identified themselves as a police officer he would still be alive today. You need look no further then Bell and his cronies with their contempt of a lawful society as the culprit of this incident.
— Posted by Keith

April 25th,
12:45 pm
Two out of three of the detectives were black! But that seems to go unnoticed. As a white man, those of you who insist on playing the black race card will be trumped by the white race card. All reliable statistics clearly indicate that African-Americans…a misnomer since if you were born in the U.S. you’re an American- by the way- in any event, commit far more felonies than white folks. Perhaps when, if ever, the violent crime rate of American blacks equals or is less than those of white Americans, our police officers will be less forceful in dealing with potential criminals. But even if 1 bullet killed Bell, the race card would still be played.
— Posted by b. alan

...thats both sides speaking. For and against verdict. and clicking here will take you on a journey through history


Idle conversations at the end of the night

Flav: um i think u need to check the stats on that strap on
Jax: i'm so mad there's no penis
Flav: cause it still hasnt come to my house yet
Jax: in my mailbox yet
Flav: OMG
Flav: mad
Jax: thats so FUNNY
Flav: LMAO
Jax: me and mommy were just talking abt that ESP
Flav: mad about it
Jax: thats so funny


Submitted by request...

The cavalcade of sexiness

There are Heroes, There are Superheroes...

..and then there's Will Smith's new July 4th blockbuster ^_^

...I look forward to being a part of that audience.

Update: There's "Seven Pounds" coming out later this year (or early next). I hear Tom Cruise's son is playing Will's character as a kid. What are friends for?

Love in this Club

i wont pretend i dont like the video. But it's like a calmer version of "Yeah". And shame on his wife for being so overly jealous on set. Have some respect for yourself chica.


For the 8th time in the past 3 years, mi famillia 'thought I knew' when another family member died. And of course, this is only after it comes up days-weeks later in casual conversation. Father thought I was joking about the fact that my cousin's sister would 'forget' to tell the family if she died. As he proceeds to speak of her in past tense i actually have to ask. The result being '...yea. That happened a few nights ago.' Oh, is that all? Well, thank you for the notification. Glad I didnt miss anything huge like some paint drying on the wall. People in this family really need to go back to school for training in how to communicate...work on that a little.


it was a fabulous party....



i really couldnt stifle that burst of shock-laughter that came out as i watched in slo-mo. the process...

What are the odds?

Angelina Jolie, Jessica Alba, and Jennifer Lopez all having twins. What. are the odds? and so far (i believe) that Angie is having one of each just like J. Lo. I hope when my time comes, that I can be so lucky


Thoughts and Speculation...

So today I realized how much my father doesnt know or care to know, and just how absent he is from my life. But thats not what bothers me. I think what really saddens me is that I dont care. I'm not put off by the fact that he's really taking up space. Whether i'm loud or quiet; if i talk or dont talk, its all me. Evidently, whatever happens is brought on by something i did or failed to do. I have an issue, i aggravate myself. I'm my own problem. I'm the reason for any and everything that's off with life. It's times like these that i remember why i really made this blog. And it's times like these that i think i can almost grasp what it was in life that made me ever start writing in the first place...

what a depressing apprehension.


A Shot at Love Deux

Jessie Spano strikes again

Ms. Berkley has found herself on a new show, and on very familiar ground. She's hosting the new Step It Up and Dance show on BravoTv. I'm sure she loves it. After all, she was a dancer before an actress

It's nice to see her pulling away from Showgirls...

for that extra closeness

when you just wanna share in everything you do....there's
the TwoDaLoo. It's the world's first two-person toilet! I know we've all been dreaming of the day that we could share such an experience...

The official description can be found here

Campari Breasts

You cant honestly say that title didnt grab some attention.

I adore her, I truly do. Salma makes me smile inside.

and the reason for this to exist when there are....people that will do it for free, is beyond my comprehension.


Public Enemies

When I picked up this week's People magazine, it was to find out what the '100 tips from the stars' were regarding the multitudes of hot bodies. I was very very hyped to see Johnny Depp in a photo that made me wish I had a camera. If anyone else knew about this they should have told. me.

So Johnny is starring as John Dillinger in the upcoming movie Public Enemies. And by all means he is far from the only popular actor in this one - Channing Tatum, Christian Bale, Giovanni Ribisi, Stephen Dorff - it's just magnificent. Cant wait for the release.

Update - I happened to find media on it. There are people out there that knew! Read on here


The Return of Ms. Spears

Taken from the news:
"How good was Britney on 'How I Met Your Mother'? Good enough to spawn a series. The Word has learned that after watching the dethroned pop princess' guest spot on the sitcom, CBS president Les Moonves convened an emergency meeting of writers, producers and network executives at his mountain fortress in Brentwood Ca, to hash out a plan for a Spears-led prime-time vehicle.
The result: We can report exclusively that Spears will play the role of jilted woman-turned-plucky local news producer Mary Richards next fall in a relaunch of "The Mary Tyler Moore Show".
'This is an amazing opportunity for Britney and for CBS,' one network executive told us. 'Mary Tyler Moore personified the American woman's cultural shift from the kitchen to the workplace in the 1970s. We think Britney is the same kind if icon. And she's totally lost some weight.'
Sources at CBS confirm that work began on the project over the weekend. Spears spent most of Sunday with the network's team of stylists as they attempted to recreate Moore's trademark bouffant using the new star's weave. But 17 hours of testing proved fruitless.
'We tried every product, every iron we had,' one stylist said. 'At one point, the weave spontaneously burst into flames. But Britney's a pro. She never panicked. She just sang the chorus to 'Shout at the Devil,' then yelled something in Latin. Whatever she said, I guess the weave listened to her, because it extinguished itself.'
'We're just going to put her in a wig for the first season,' another stylist added.
Though and executive producer has yet to be named and no full-time writing staff has been assembled, high-level CBS executives have already begun casting the show. Audrina Patridge of 'The Hills' is set to play Mary's feisty neighbor and best friend Rhoda, while Sir Anthony Hopkins is close to signing on as Mary's boss, the curmudgeonly Lou Grant. No word yet on who will play Beelzebub, Prince of Lies.'*

*Happy April Fools Day =0)

Is there something to the single life?

"Me, personally, from a relationship standpoint, I am a single guy ...I am definitely single. And I've been on my Web site and seeing how girls have been threatening me and saying I'm a liar, and I'm like, 'It's not even that.' The thing is, I have a close friend, but it's not like a relationship. I'm not trying to settle down. I'm only 18, so I'm just trying to live my life and have fun." - Chris Brown addressing the rumors of his romantic affair with Rihanna

if ever he does decide to get himself into a relationship. I hope she's still on the market. They really are cute together