One Question.....

why does he (Joseph Cross)...



look like them (Aaron & Shawn Ashmore)?

Wannabes

It gets under my skin so. deep. when i see those girls that wanna be cute. All the time. Because they just embarass themselves and to an extent me. One sat in front of me in class today, by the windows, and took off her coat to reveal an off-the-shoulder top that wasnt even sweater-thick. Mind you, its 35 degrees on campus and windy as all hell. I'm not sure who she was trying to impress, but neither girls nor guys were paying her half-naked self any mind.

Halfway through the class, i noticed miss miss was riddled with goosebumps, all over her shoulders. I. wonder. why. As i look around at all the other girls in the class, even those away from the windows, hav their coats still on. Not Ms. Pretty. However, not long after her freeze episode, here she is dragging her coat up and around her, to keep her simple self warm. How is it that it's ok for u to complain of being cold, when u didn't take the time to dress so that ur warm to begin with? it seems kind of oxymoronic to me. that's like going to the beach on july 15, in your northface hood up, and asking yourself why it is that ur on fire. Next time i hope she'll dress for the weather.

Its great and all that you wanna be cute in freezing temps. But, maybe this is a stretch, how about being cute in an attractive turtleneck and sum matching fur line boots? You'll be stylish and warm, instead of stylish and hypothermic.

Recognition

In brighter news, one of my recent free verses, "Regret" is up for an award. But people of course, have to vote for it. So, Rate my poem "Regret", Go here
Check it out, and vote however you see fit. And while your there, whether you like or not, share your opinions. :-)

Regret

by: Jacklyn F Williams

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I never saw you,
spoke to you,
held you close.
Back then all I could do,
was think of me.
I've thought of nothing but you ever since.
I weep today,
your day,
as I do every year now.
I miss you.
I love you.
Happy birthday.

inTreatment

i would just like to thank my parents. for showing me just how supportive they are and will be, and how much they truly care when it comes to the things i take on. sometimes, its good to know things early...before life gets too deep.


I enjoy watching HBO's new 5-day series "in Treatment". I thoroughly enjoy it. I think anyone who has the time open on M-F at 930 should see it...every day is a different person's session. Friday is the therapist in therapy. make yourself a fan of one of the sessions...you wont be disappointed.

Devil's Advocate

Maybe its because i've been on that side of the fence for so long, maybe its just because i'm tired of seeing everything torn to shreds, but I really dont condone what the press does to Britney Spears. The paparazzi do...horrible things to her, and she's already not in a good way. I think they simply exacerbate what's already happening to her. She's probably had one of the worst stress-induced breakdowns in existence with her career, the kids, that...husband...of hers, and the family. And as much as everyone likes to think they see every little bit of whats happening in her life, i'm sure it isnt true. I dont see why her problems have to take center stage in the news. She, like other celebrities (though not all) i think has earned and deserves some degree of privacy. I've seen the mental issues, i've been there. I am there. Its just unfair to her...ridiculously unfair. Some things should be considered private, paparazzi or not. They just dont know when to stop. I think there is a point when they stop being human and just become...something worse.

I'm not taking her side, i dont think she's in the right place to involve Sean and Jayden, but its not like she's chosen to be here.


she's 5'5"...a part of me is ashamed that I wanna look the way she used to look..back when her career and performance were at their peak. The other part is quite proud. Because I know that with simple therapy, she can snap right back into that and become a "proper" role model. she's only 27 after all...

For St. Valentine lovers everywhere

Two reasons to hit the nearest theatre in three weeks

Via imdb.com - Will Hayes, a 30-something Manhattan dad is in the midst of a divorce when his 10 year old daughter, Maya, starts to question him about his life before marriage. Maya wants to know absolutely everything about how her parents met and fell in love. Will's story begins in 1992, as a young, starry-eyed aspiring politician who moves to New York from Wisconsin in order to work on the Clinton campaign. For Maya, Will relives his past as a idealistic young man learning the ins and outs of big city politics, and recounts the history of his romantic relationships with three very different women. On the campaign, Will's best buddy is Russell McCormack. They not only have similar political aspirations, they share the same type of girl problems, too. Will hopelessly attempts a "PG" version of his story for his daughter ad changes the names so Maya has to guess who he finally married. Is her mother Will's college sweetheart, the dependable girl next-door Emily? Is she his longtime best friend and confidante, he apolitical April? Or is she the free-spirited but ambitious journalist? As Maya puts together the pieces of her dad's romantic puzzle, she begins to understand that love is not so simple or easy. And as Will tells her his tale, Maya helps him to understand that it's definitely never too late to go back...and maybe even possible to find a happy ending.

Go forth and enjoy! I know where i'll be that weekend....

When there was Justin

I was feeling nostalgic for the good times and went looking for things. What I found saddened me deeply. Here are my favorites....

...Baby One More Time


Oops I Did It Again


before In The Zone

...stay away from Kevins

Fashion Upgrade

By March, I will own these

yes...i want & will have both




and that is just the sexiest ever.

Relationship Math

Relationships---> male+female, male+male, female+female. all good things. but they can be such an unnecessary headache.

so alot of analyzing has been done on relas over the past few days. the conclusion is this - yes, relationships are work...but that work shouldn't be one-sided and more importantly, more time should be spent in a state of happiness, enjoying the rela. Me, LibraDreamer & New Jack have spent alot of the last few days going over past relationships and current, "comparing notes" so to speak. Why? because we are attempting to avoid repeating the history of a fourth person...crazy crazy female that she is. And as hard as relationships can get, there are just some places they shouldn't go. There are times when things will give and efforts will be made...improvement ensues, but then there are times when one has to sit back and contemplate what's best for the individual.

So yea, watched the moment of truth last night. A handful of my friends and I held a conference during the show, answering the questions along with the contestants. It was quite an interesting experience. The second guy, admitted to himself that he had a gambling problem. I thought that was interesting, brave, and...groundbreaking. Because that's something he can take home with his girlfriend, and work on. Maybe apologize to his ex-wife for as well. He seemed to put true thought into that answer. I like thought. The first guy, who was a personal trainer, admitted that he wasnt rushing to have children with his wife because he didnt think she was the one, and also that if her stomach got bigger, he'd recommend lipo. Wow. And even after that, she kept pushing - "No, keep going, I want to hear everything else." Either she relishes in the pain, the money is worth that much to her, OR, people actually desire the truth deep down, whether they admit it or not. Interesting... I look forward to next week.

less depressing, more upbeat - this dude in my class has a sexy mohawk. I hope to be a guy next time around. I will flaunt one hard. Although i think his mohawk is sorta special/unique cuz he has queer hair. lol

Will America reveal it all?

....i am absolutely willing and ready to go on this show. Sometimes the truth needs to be said, whether one is ready or not.

The New Piper

...real talk.

Good Dying Young?

what will your dash say about you?


Brad Renfro - 7/25/82 - 1/15/08



Heath Ledger - 4/4/79 - 1/22/08


And somehow I cant help but notice that equal treatment wasnt given...the reason (so far) i've gotten for that is that Brad isnt as hot as Heath. I dont know but to me, look shouldnt dictate how people react when you die. Cause it definitely cant be said that Heath was so much better than him in acting...look at the bodies of work.

Rest In Peace guys.

Blurb City

its been weeks, this is true. But i've got a little to share.

There is a different kind of comedian...that everyone should know. But to get into his stuff you have to be majorly open. He pushes past boundaries that others dont even venture around. In my opinion...he's as good as (maybe better?) than monsieurs Cook. He sings, and he's a little hottie also. But i leave the choice up to you.


this is Dane Cook. Also known as 'Good Luck Chuck'. He's got like 3 comedy albums, a comedy DVD or 2, and...at least 4 movies (Waiting..., Mr. Brooks, Good Luck Chuck, Employee of the Month) out already.



this is Stephen Lynch....he is the man. he has...3 of his own albums, besides the broadway stuff.





....enough said.


It has just been made known to me that my Knuckles is home for the year to finish his schooling. That means more harassment and possibly stealing treadmills from his basement while he harasses and steals weights from me. Taking it back to high school. Who doesnt like familiarity?

It may be just me, but I've found that my house has a smell to it. It got to me so much today that I went cleaning. I mopped the floors, I scrubbed the hell out of my mattress, and vacuumed/washed rugs into oblivion. It still smells a bit in here to me..and I am determined to find the source. I dont care if i have to rescrub every day. Along the same lines, this place has gotten its next upgrade...we have the new intercom system and meter (they got tired of our 3month stint of free electricity). This place is closing in on me....

Classes resume at 9:30 am....am I ready? at least its a short day.

The burden of children

My mom just came and told me that she is in actuality, the only person being fired from her job. Previously, it was supposed to be all "monitors" and others that werent per diem. She discovered today (and shared the news quite calmly, almost laughably) that she's the only one being let go because her supervisor didnt go to bat for her. All four of the other people's supers went to the big boss and explained to him why they were necessary. But she lucked out in getting the one supervisor that is concerned only with the security of her own job. So while everyone else's monitors get to stay til the end of February, this lady is planning a pizza party send-off for my mom on Friday.

Something else my mom said stuck a bit. One of her co-workers and friend (who despises unfairness) commented on how one day, mom's super will get what's coming to her. I recalled to mind an old saying I once heard - "Children will pay for the sins of their fathers." I fear for any kids she might have, because I actually put stock in that particular saying. I dont know if it's karma of fate or what's written in the cards, but knowing the history of some people and then looking at where they are now...I worry. I wonder if my mom's getting fall off from her mom (she wont admit it now, but she was concerned with it herself before my grandmother died). Her mother is a 1st class wiotch. If anyone has seen Madea's Family Reunion, her mom is like Lynn Whitfield's character. Just...biased and...hateful and...selfish and...cruel. to everyone. And because she's lived her life, mom's been taking it for her, like a trade off. What a scary thought.

Back to the Future

Life has a funny way of running in circles. I swear the past just always comes back around to bring new and interesting things. Severely late (this is like 10:30), my house phone is ringing. Mother picks it up, because it’s what she does, I expect it. What I didn’t expect was the phone call to be for me. Who calls my house for me? Especially that late at night. Especially in the middle of the week. No one, that’s who. She comes to my door, “Do you know a Greg? He’s on the phone for you.” Of course, I have no idea who the hell Greg is, and I get on her for letting him know that I exist in the first place. Mother goes back, and tells him that I’m sleeping, and asks for his info. He reveals that I know him from St. Fortunata. Now for those that don’t know, that’s RFK days, going on 12. years. ago. He says that he was looking at his yearbook and saw my pic and decided to call. Interesting enough, as St. Fortunata wasn’t a fan of RFK. Knowing that, I’m fully aware of who Greg is, but still unsure as to how he got my number or even moreso, why he’s calling me so far in the future. Mommy Dearest got the number and shared it with me, as “she has no use for it.” I’m contemplating calling, because my nature has me bugged as to what fueled this call. There’s some kind of conspiracy going and I must get to the bottom of it. I only wish I was still close to the RFK girls that hung out with those guys, so that I could share in this experience fully. What in the hell could he possibly want? Ma thinks that this may be a good thing, because it's...the past (she was a huge fan of my past)? But she didn’t go to school with us, she knows naught. SFS people will always be suspicious to me. Always. Worse case scenario, I have to kill him. Best case scenario, I get a blast from the past turned into a new friend. Win-Win I say.

I purchased two pairs of shoes on my outing today, $10 a piece. They’re a style I never thought I’d wear (pics to come later), but I’m in love. I think they are the cutest little things. If the weather stays as global warming as it is, LibraDreamer did me a solid and bought me a killer sweater as well. Snoogans. I owe her hard for doing me such a big favor. And she will totally get repaid x12 whether she likes it or not. I think my sense of style is broadening a bit. I like dressing up and looking nice, even when I’m not going anywhere special. I lean towards eye makeup almost every day, and I plan to make better use of my contacts as well. I wont follow in the footsteps of New Jack & Knuckles, who think its cool to wear contacts for 6 months to a year on end and then wonder why their eyes bleed upon removal. That is totally not an act of God guys =0p.

I found a bunch of stories I wrote back in the day when I was a writer. Looking back and reading them myself, I think I was a pretty good writer. Alas, I don’t see myself picking it back up anytime soon. The dream of people being enthralled in my work (as I am in the likes of Stephen King and Scott Smith) has long passed me. Its nice to look back at what I could’ve been. It gives me a little hope for my kids, that maybe they’ll inherit my writing ‘skill’ and hopefully find an audience that likes it and shares it with others. And after I finish reading them all, maybe even elaborating a little more on one in particular, they will be buried again. It’s like my own little time capsule, buried to be found sometime in the future and read again, as a little reminder of what once was.

Sidekick Wars

I’ve developed quite a habit. I noticed it tonight coming home on the train. And I started to wonder if I’m the only one that gets some sort of sick pleasure from showing off my phone. Now, the split amongst the Sidekick Nation is as prominent as NYers & Boston. Sidekick Nation LX & Sidekick Nation Slide share different experiences. Anyway my story…this little chicky sitting next to me on the train trying to be cute, spiderman webslings her LX out of her pocket & proceeds to show off for the whole car. Of course she’s one of those, as I know MANY of u are, that as soon as u see daylight, it means signal, and u must contact anyone that u think will respond. Not I. So three stops later, while she’s furiously IMing Stevie Mcgee, I casually pull out my Slide, sliiide up my screen, and proceed to respond to messages that have been coming since we got above ground. I watch her using my periphs, as she stops dead in her tracks and just gawks at my phone. Everytime I slide it up or down, there her eyes are…along with everyone else in our vicinity. Now she’s glancing back and forth between her phone and mine, all confuzzled, and I’m smiling because I have successfully mind-f3cked her..as per my mission. The ONLY differences I’ve seen in the sidekick babies is a bigger screen & the same sk2/3 flip of old on the LX, where as the slide is like half an inch smaller and it sliiides. If you find any other difference u come and tell me. Please.

So thinking back, she isn’t the first person with a form of sidekick remorse. It seems like majority of the ppl with either sidekick, wanna either switch and ride the other train, or have a ticket for both. Whats that about? Be happy with what ya got. Cant have it all right? Since I’m not going blind anytime soon, my “small” screen serves me fine. I heart my dear Slide. Til death or severe anger do us part ^_^

My Gladiators

I've found my foothold...I know what two people I'm gonna support through this season of AG. I'm saddened my Ms. Marine Bonnie losing last night but it's ok. There's also a runner up guy named Anthony A., my NY firefighter.


Siene - 34, 5'4" 127lbs, Gymnastics Instructor/Life Coach. I like her cause she's effing fierce. Her gymnast skills have her making crazy moves to get around the gladiators. She outmaneuvered Venom. And she has personality. ^_^

Adonis - 23, 6'0" 196lbs, Boeing Engineer. He first got my bid cuz i saw that he was so young...whereas most (if not all?) of the athletes i've seen are grown, married, children, families, some retired and such. Easy to cheer for, cause he's in the same age league.


Ballin'

Discoveries

whoever wrote this PostSecret is on to something. I think this in my head sometimes as I look at my 'work' possibilities. I think it in my head on occasion when I look at my family (although I fit in more now than ever with the majority of people closest to me. What's the real meaning of the word?). Thoughts like these, might fuel alot of my resentment for life. People underestimate things so easily. I'm fully aware that i'm lucky to be living where I live, or anywhere at all. I'm lucky to not b in the bottom 5% of America, this is true. I'm also fully aware that there's a percentage much higher up than me. and when I see it taken for granted, it saddens and infuriates me. I guess its really just my own issue ya know? If i know sumthing has 2 b done, i'll forego fun unless its entirely free. People closest to me know allll about it. I dont see movies, i dont travel. I cant. Every scrap of money I get gets thrown at a bill. I went back 2 my lemon diet for a bit even so that I wasnt tempted to spend $ on food stuffs. But i've seen things...I've seen people in financial sitchs as bad as mine, that still 'live it up', but then come back & cry about how the bills are overwhelming them. How does that work? One of my life buddies (12+ years) had an away message yesterday, harsh as it may be - "if you've got hair on ya pussy, i'm taking some tape and ripping it off. you dont have time to shave, but you've got time to eat lobster?" Cant have it both ways. thats not the way it works. period.

I spent the part of my weekend that wasnt dedicated to work in Conneticut. I was kidnapped by two people with a car, one of which has the ability to drag me off. I went willingly. I met Momma Jeremiah, and was given a good luck honey-doused orange. I guess I was wrong, Haitians & Dominicans are a nice mix. She treated me as if I was a staple in the family, like I make the trip on the regular. It was nice sleeping in a house. J&K have no. idea. how much i thoroughly enjoyed running up and down the stairs. I felt like I was at home. It was so quiet and calm and peaceful up there. I've decided that will be my new home. I will find somewhere up there to stay, I dont care how long it takes. The only thing is highways at night...no lights along the side. But how much driving will I be doing late at night? Lets be serious. I cant wait to go back. I'd appreciate an invite anytime.

While we were up there yesterday, we celebrated the end of a 11 year absence. American Gladiators is officially back. Two hour premiere last night...and the new gladiators are as hot as ever. If he wasnt (probably) pushing 40, I'd say that Nitro should've been tossed back in the mix. Nitro was thee man on the old AG. The sexiest of the clan (in my opinion) ------>

Crush


Toa


Siren


Militia


and Venom.

There's more on these and the rest of the twelve right here. So feel free to browse. I plan to watch the rest of it tonight (8pm, channel 4). I look forward to the renewal of an even older show in "Knight Rider". Thats right, NBC is on point this year.

2008 - Year of the Jax

Daily Horoscope Overview
Although New Year's Day is not an astrological holiday, it is a significant marker of time when we think about the year ahead. Today's collaborative Libra Moon helps us to be rational, yet we won't be able to keep our emotions undercover for long as assertive Mars moves to oppose passionate Pluto tomorrow. The Moon enters intense Scorpio (the sign of Mars and Pluto) at 8:32 pm EST to amplify our feelings. Being kind is more important than being right.

Tuesday, January 1st, 2008

Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 - Oct 22)
Your moods could get in the way of an otherwise relaxing day. You might even find yourself in a funk, with no easy way back to Pleasantville. Remember, you aren't responsible for everyone else's enjoyment. Oddly enough, if you do what you need to make yourself happy today, others will appreciate you even more.

Last night was more for me more than anything I think….it was done to give me one more thing to add to the short list of upside for 2007. I went way off my diet for the last night of the year. Between me and two other people, we finished off 4 bottles of Moet over the course of early-morning new year. I couldn’t be more thrilled about it. I wanted to wash away 2007 as emphatically as possible. It was a year that I looked forward to the end of for some time now. You’re right; I’m not responsible for everyone else’s enjoyment. I did my part in spreading the word. I cant force people to commit to things. If they want to, they will. And that’s that. My mom used to tell me that all the time. You cant make someone do anything they don’t want to do or aren’t mentally ready for. I did get a little emotional last night and this morning, and today.I’ve remembered that everyone isn’t ready for the brash no-holds-barred truth of matters.

I went for a nice walk this morning…definitely not in a funk anymore. I feel stupendous actually. It makes me feel good about myself, knowing that I’m putting in the effort to get and keep my weight down. I’ve decided to instill this walking regime into my everyday routine, currently mon-fri. once classes resume it’ll shift to every other day (m/w/f/sat). I like it a lot…it wakes me up and actually I think boosts my energy a bit. I’m also trying very valiantly to scramble together coin for this elliptical. It can fit in my room. It can fit. I have a new goal of 150lbs by July. That’s actually quite reasonable, even with moderate exercise and a small change in diet. I will be utilizing you Knuckles. I wanna be a track star =0P

I came up with two Postsecrets to send last night before I went to bed. Finally! I know exactly how they will look and where my words will be. Now all I need is to actually put them together. I’m so excited to become a contributor and not just a reader, like it’s an exclusive club or something. I cant wait to get them off my chest. I didn’t realize that I’d been burdened so long by them.

Congratulations to everyone else who went out partying last night and got back in one piece, albeit severely drunk and/or hungover. Water is a savior of many! Good luck in the new year, make things happen for yourselves. I know I will.