Growth

"The choices we make have the ability to impact our present as well as shape our future. If all of that goes without saying, we can move with the understanding that the choices we fail to make have the same effects"

Realizations are abound. it's the most incredible thing. ever since I found out I lost the baby, it's as if my...outlook has changed. I mean I know I said Austin has given me hope, but I feel different. Every day is better. I'm writing more, like I used to before I had to grow up. I've been free-writing. journaling. blogging. I even spit out a couple of fiction pieces. With everything, I decided to unplug for a bit also. I don't think anyone even noticed the absence. The holidays are coming and I'm pretty ok with going it solo. I even did (in my mind) a good deed and switched shifts with a friend, so that he can spend the holiday with his girlfriend. That will also keep me out of Black Friday trouble. I have a couple interviews coming up. They could decide where my life goes from here. Do I jump head first into children's health? Do I wait it out, see where ED takes me? I've always been one for new experiences. I thrive on them. I don't feel like I can grow in a stagnant environment. I have things to contemplate. And next week, I go home! it's been six months already. I've changed so much in such a short time. I wonder how I'd fit in up there. I'm looking at people and things much differently now, especially in relation to me. I actually don't think I would fit in up there anymore. The friends I have, the friends I'm making...they just aren't the same. Austin must have been a lot like his mother. Or at least the person she used to be. That person she's trying to be again. All of this creativity and inspiration is coming from somewhere.