I came through for my good buddy Manny today. He's been sort of down recently. Hella sick. Trying to die. Something i dont appreciate it. lol. I made time in my retardo schedule to see him to show I caaaaare. Good times. Goooood times.
I got to see two people I havent seen or really spoken to in like generations. O em Gee, Raatiq & J-Dub.
The best part of the day was our random burst into song via disney. We acappella'd "Be Prepared". From the lion king, act like u know.
So many more quotes now. Soooo many things we discussed.
Showing posts with label old school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label old school. Show all posts
7.06.2009
3.08.2009
Family Matters - 300 Pt 2
Yesterday, as part of my job as a dispatcher, I had to go out on the road with a driver while he took a bus through the 4 important boroughs. Luckily for me, I ended up with my dad which meant that I didnt have to pay a whole lot of attention, and I didnt have to worry about being talked to death (my other option was a man who made a comment about how i wasnt skinny, but he could get with a bigger girl 'no problem'. i'm sure my dad was as close to vomiting as I was). I spent my time reading and staring out the window, occasionally engaging in convo with the passengers he picked up.
But when i'm left alone long enough, I tend to start thinking. I start looking back on the steps i've taken and where I am, reliving memories - both good and bad - and rehashing old ideas. I started thinking, really thinking, about my history. How I used to be. And, not that I'm that odd, but I used to be much more normal years ago. Thinking about it, I found the breaking point. The moment in which the Jax I am today was born. And that was a cold day in February of 1997. That was the day that my brother decided he was moving west, and taking my nephews with him.
My brother was born in 1965. I was born in 1985. His children, my nephews, were born in 1990. They were a major part of my life for 7 years. Seven years of my childhood was wrapped around them. They were, for all intents and purposes, my brothers. And although i'm sure it's nothing like a parent losing a child, it didnt change the fact that it felt to me like a part of me left with them. I just havent been the same since. I lost a giant piece of me that day and I've just never gotten it back. And the result is, I missed the biggest events of their lives, and now, of their little brothers too. Everytime I think of it I cry a little inside.
Two points in my life i'd like to go back to. One - that cold day in february. Two - the first day of high school. I'd be with my future husband to this day if only i'd made a couple better decisions in high school. Sigh, if only.
But when i'm left alone long enough, I tend to start thinking. I start looking back on the steps i've taken and where I am, reliving memories - both good and bad - and rehashing old ideas. I started thinking, really thinking, about my history. How I used to be. And, not that I'm that odd, but I used to be much more normal years ago. Thinking about it, I found the breaking point. The moment in which the Jax I am today was born. And that was a cold day in February of 1997. That was the day that my brother decided he was moving west, and taking my nephews with him.
My brother was born in 1965. I was born in 1985. His children, my nephews, were born in 1990. They were a major part of my life for 7 years. Seven years of my childhood was wrapped around them. They were, for all intents and purposes, my brothers. And although i'm sure it's nothing like a parent losing a child, it didnt change the fact that it felt to me like a part of me left with them. I just havent been the same since. I lost a giant piece of me that day and I've just never gotten it back. And the result is, I missed the biggest events of their lives, and now, of their little brothers too. Everytime I think of it I cry a little inside.
Two points in my life i'd like to go back to. One - that cold day in february. Two - the first day of high school. I'd be with my future husband to this day if only i'd made a couple better decisions in high school. Sigh, if only.
2.16.2009
iLove
it makes me happy to see strong friendships grow, and spread, and include others.
...I love the openness of the four of them. Yay for friends becoming friends =0)
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